Top Ten Games To Play On Valentine’s Day

Did Valentine’s Day pass you by, and you wish you had played a video game instead of whatever you actually did? Are you already searching for that perfect game to play next year with your significant other? Look no further! For countless hours I’ve personally poured through every game ever released to determine the definitive top ten list of games to play on Valentine’s Day.

Now you may be asking yourself “What makes it the perfect Valentines Day game anyways?” Well the answer is quite simple it just has to have the word “love” in the title! Prove me wrong!

1. We Love Katamari

Platform(s): PlayStation 2

Developer: Namco

Does it have co-op? Yes

The sequel to the hit game Katamari Damacy has players once again rolling stuff up with their Katamari in this fun, but difficult third person puzzle game. If you are unfamiliar with the Katamari series, essentially you are tasked with rolling up objects with a magic ball that makes any item smaller than it stick to it, and add to its size. You start off small and are able to only pick up things such as thumbtacks, erasers and paperclips, but eventually you’ll be picking up cars, people and even buildings! Usually the game tasks you with getting to certain size within the time limit, but sometimes has you doing other things such as picking up objects for how valuable they are, or avoiding touching certain items. This sequel made minor improvements upon the original, added a few new modes and increased customization options. Like the original We Love Katamari also features a two-player battle mode where players try to compete to have the biggest katamari, but it also features a brand new co-operative mode where each player controls one half of the katamari, which surely won’t drive you insane with how difficult it is!

2. Lovers in a Dangerous Spacetime

Platform(s) : PC, Mac, PS4, Xbox One, Switch

Developer: Asteroid Base

Co-op? Yes

Alright I know I’m bending the rules a little bit already because the word “lovers” isn’t exactly the word “love”, but this game is so good it deserves recognition. Lovers in a Dangerous Space Time is a frantic and fun space shooter that has players working together by running around their ship to control different things such as weapons, shields and navigation. The game requires constant communication and teamwork to progress through its difficult campaigns that will have you laughing and screaming at each other at the same time.

3. James Bond 007: From Russia With Love

Platform(s): PlayStation 2, Xbox, GameCube, PlayStation Portable

Developer: EA Redwood Shores

Co-op? No, but has a split screen competitive mode

Based off of one of the better James Bond movies this third person shooter features a single player campaign that sees Sean Connery reprise his role as James Bond to record new dialogue. The game received mixed reviews from critics for its easy difficulty and no online play, but featured a competitive 4 player split screen mode. This is a perfect game for a Valentine’s date night because what’s more fun than shooting your loved one in the back because they can’t figure out that bizarre PS2 control scheme that you don’t remember it having, but all PS2 games seem to have anyways.

4. QuackShot Starring Donald Duck

Platform(s): Sega Genesis, Sega Saturn

Developer: Sega

Co-op? No

I know what you’re thinking, and no I’m technically not breaking the rules because in Japan this gem is called “I Love Donald Duck: The Treasure of King Georgia”. In this 2D platformer, which was inspired by Indiana Jones, you control Donald Duck as he searches for the treasure of King Garuzia, ruler of the Great Duck Kingdom. The game features interesting platforming mechanics such as a plunger gun that can be used to stun enemies or make temporary platforms to climb walls. The game received fairly positive reviews according the aggregate site Game Rankings where it holds a 76.50% based on a whole two reviews!

5. We Love Golf!

Platform(s): Wii

Developer: Camelot Software Planning

Co-op? Probably?

Alright I’m not going to lie to you I’ve never played “We Love Golf!” so I don’t really have much to say about it, other than that I’m surprised it isn’t called “Wii Love Golf!”, but I mean it’s a golf game I guess, so sporty couples should enjoy it right? I mean it’s probably co-op because it’s golf and it’s on the Wii so it pretty much has to be. It currently holds a 75 on Metacritic and that’s probably not changing anytime soon, so at least you know it should be alright.

6. Bury Me, My Love

Platform(s): Switch, IPhone, IPad, PC

Developer: The Pixel Hunt, Arte France, FIGS

Co-op? No

Bury Me, My Love is a text adventure that tells the story of a Syrian refugee as she journeys to Europe, and communicates with her husband who has stayed behind over text. Now to be honest again I’ve never played this game, but visually it looks really cool. When I first saw the name of this I thought “Wait is that the name of a Thirty Seconds to Mars song?” but a quick internet search proved that it was in fact not. Anyways it looks like you get to make choices, so that could be fun to play about with someone I guess.

7. I Love My (Series)

Platform(s): 3DS

Developer: Neopica

Co-op? God I hope not

There’s so many of these fucking things I just don’t get it. I Love My Little Boy, Little Girl, Horse, Dog, Cat and Suicide Cult it doesn’t seem to end! How many of these can they make? Just make it stop! Who wants these games? Do they make money? Who’s buying this crap? Kids? Don’t they deserve better than this garbage? Is this what parents buy to make their children not want to play video games anymore? I guess there could be a few reasons you could play this on Valentine’s Day. Maybe you want your significant other to leave you? Maybe they asked for a horse or some shit, and this was a much cheaper alternative.

8. Love Story

Platform(s): PS2

Developer: General Entertainment

Co-op? Probably not?

Love Story is an interactive movie released on PS2 by developer General Entertainment, which by the way is one of the worst developer names I’ve ever heard, and I don’t necessarily enjoy seeing people lose their jobs, but based purely off their development history it’s probably for the best they don’t exist anymore. Also the game is stylized as “Ø Story”, and maybe I’m just an idiot, but I have Ø clue why they would do that. Apparently you take the role of some dude that dies in a motorcycle accident, and an angel sends him back as a ghost and tells him he can be alive again if he makes some girl fall in love with him in six days. First of all, what an asshole! Six days? To fall in love? With a ghost? Unless this dude is trying to seduce Kesha, or some other freak, good luck fella. Anyways play it, or don’t, it’s only in Japanese, so bilingual couples might enjoy it, but probably not.

9. Love Revenge

Platform(s): PC, PS4, PS Vita

Developer: ?

Co-op? No?

Alright if you haven’t noticed by now I am severely struggling to find games with the word “love” in the title, and this is just proof of how underappreciated Valentine’s Day is as a holiday. While there may be better games that could make this list over “Love Revenge” I think this title deserves a spot solely based off of it’s name. Love Revenge? Who the hell doesn’t? Revenge is always good, and intensely satisfying. This hidden gem was only released in Japan, and I’m not even entirely sure what it is, so good luck tracking it down.

10. Glover

Platform(s): PC, Nintendo 64, PS1

Developer: Interactive Studios

Co-op? Mercifully No

Fuck this game. This game sucks so much. Honestly if anyone tells you otherwise my advice to you is to cut them off completely because you shouldn’t spend any time with someone who is willing to be so blatantly wrong. “If you hate this game so much why is it in your top ten list? It doesn’t even say love in the title!” Alright I get it, but while scouring the internet for these games this piece of shit consistently popped up. Honestly the word love doesn’t even belong in the name, so we should take it out. What happens when you take “love” out of “Glover”? That’s right you get “GR”, and everyone knows that stands for “Gigantic Racism” which just like Glover I think most of us can agree to hate.  For those of you that don’t know this game (Boy, are you lucky) “Glover” is a 3d platformer where you play as the severed hand of some fucking dopey wizard, and you try to stop the other severed hand from doing evil shit. In order to stop the evil hand you have to use this weird ass crystal that can turn into different things like a bowling ball or a rubber ball to traverse its poorly designed levels, and evade its weird as hell enemies. Fuck Glover.

2 thoughts on “Top Ten Games To Play On Valentine’s Day

  1. I liked it up until the part when you disrespected my boi Glover. Not cool.

    Like

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